Mindfulness is the latest craze today. It is simply, not thinking about the past, not thinking about the future, but living in the now. Easier said than done. I am not a mindfulness teacher, just a student.
Someone once told me that office buildings should have showers in every bathroom so that employees could go there to think about their problems and hopefully solve them. Showering is such an automated process to humans, that it seems like a good time to solve all problems.
However, how many times have you driven to work and when you get there, you cannot remember any part of the drive? Somehow you got there, but most likely you were thinking about some problem you needed to solve or some past issue that was bothering you. Unless something like a deer runs out in front of you, you may not remember any of the drive. I think our brains are wired that way to filter out some of the noise, but unfortunately, distraction of what you're really doing is happening.
A friend of mine who died way too young from cancer, once said in a blog to take a look outside tomorrow and try to see something that you have never seen before. I think when our life is nearly over, people often start to see the important things and no longer filter them out. Practising mindfulness helps us see that now.
The next time you are somewhere, most likely waiting for your child to finish a sport or some other hobby, instead of pulling out your phone to surf the internet, try the following practice:
Start first with something that isn't moving. Something simple like a tree. Look at it pretending that in a minute, someone is going to turn you around, hand you a piece of paper, and ask you to draw what you were staring at. You will start to notice things like how the bark looks, where branches come out of the tree, the details on the leaves, possibly some imperfections on the tree from damage, and many other things.
You will realize that in the past, you were often looking at things like a person who needed glasses. Once they get the glasses, they realize that now they can see the details like blades of grass. (Instead of a green blur). Slowly over time their eyes weakened and they did not realize that they were no longer seeing the things they use to see.
After doing that exercise, try looking at everything ahead of you. You can even test yourself by really seeing if you can draw it.
Another exercise is to stare at something that you have looked at many times before (something simple like a wall) and see if you can see some type of detail that you never noticed before.
By doing the above exercises, it forces you to concentrate on what you're doing and therefore keeps you in the present moment.
If you have something really bothering you, try going to a mall and sit down on one of the benches, leave your phone in your pocket on airplane mode, and just concentrate on staring at the people as they go by. Sometime later that day, your solution will pop in your mind.
I find that if I practice mindfulness, the answers to my problems will come to me later, usually when I'm doing something else besides thinking of my problems. By doing other things, your solutions will come to you when you least expect them.
This topic is so large that I will contribute more to this subject in future blogs.
Thursday, July 14, 2016
Tuesday, July 12, 2016
Work, The Carrot, & Fear
What motivates you to do a good job at your work? Is it personal satisfaction or is it fear?
Most of us dream of having a career that we would love to do day in and day out. Waking up in the morning wishing you were already there working away. However, most of us instead only have a job that allows us to pay the bills and hopefully retire one day. When we are motivated by the latter, it is fear that ultimately drives us daily.
Fear of losing our job, fear of being embarrassed, fear of not getting a raise, fear of not getting a promotion, fear of being reprimanded, fear of making mistakes, fear of not meeting a deadline, fear of being demoted, fear of feeling like a failure, and on and on is the fear.
There is an analogy of putting a carrot on the end of a stick while sitting on the back of a horse or donkey, trying to get the animal to move forward to get the carrot. After a day of chasing the carrot, the animal is given the carrot, but the next day the same routine is repeated. Maybe this will go on for days, but eventually the animal may grow tired of the chase (realizing that the carrot keeps moving forward as the animal walks forward) and instead decides that it is better to graze in the open field where there is plenty to eat. The animal does not have the fear that humans have, not knowing what the future consequences may be if they no longer perform whatever task the person is trying to accomplish with them. (I remember trying this with my dog when I was young, it was not motivated at all).
Our human minds are a blessing but also a burden when we create scenarios that have not happened and may never happen. Humans can imagine and overthink many potentially fictitious outcomes if they don't chase the carrot. Not staying late to finish tasks or in general putting in more hours to continually meet deadlines; fear is what motivates the worker. The manager sees that they are motivated, and often puts more on their plate. However, at any given time, when the worker decides that they do not wish to chase the carrot, they know there could be consequences for that decision. And instead of going on a vacation with their family, they stay behind. (I must admit, that I have done that before, twice).
When I first started my career, I didn't mind putting in the extra hours to try to learn, get ahead, and get noticed. The carrot was always dangling there in front of me. But as I got older and started a family, I started to realize that there is a need for work / life balance.
Some people however are motivated through fear and put their career before their family. A good movie that tells the consequences of that mentality is "About Schmidt" starring Jack Nicolson. After he retires he realizes that the company is moving on just fine without him, he barely knows his wife, and never really had much of a relationship with his daughter. When he tries to give her marriage advice, she tells him he has no right to do that since he was not there when she was growing up.
There will always be that carrot, but you need to decide if you will let fear motivate you. Don't live your life where you are counting down the days to retirement and reacting to fear. Ultimately, you need to do what makes you happy. In a future blog, I will review a book on that very topic.
Most of us dream of having a career that we would love to do day in and day out. Waking up in the morning wishing you were already there working away. However, most of us instead only have a job that allows us to pay the bills and hopefully retire one day. When we are motivated by the latter, it is fear that ultimately drives us daily.
Fear of losing our job, fear of being embarrassed, fear of not getting a raise, fear of not getting a promotion, fear of being reprimanded, fear of making mistakes, fear of not meeting a deadline, fear of being demoted, fear of feeling like a failure, and on and on is the fear.
There is an analogy of putting a carrot on the end of a stick while sitting on the back of a horse or donkey, trying to get the animal to move forward to get the carrot. After a day of chasing the carrot, the animal is given the carrot, but the next day the same routine is repeated. Maybe this will go on for days, but eventually the animal may grow tired of the chase (realizing that the carrot keeps moving forward as the animal walks forward) and instead decides that it is better to graze in the open field where there is plenty to eat. The animal does not have the fear that humans have, not knowing what the future consequences may be if they no longer perform whatever task the person is trying to accomplish with them. (I remember trying this with my dog when I was young, it was not motivated at all).
Our human minds are a blessing but also a burden when we create scenarios that have not happened and may never happen. Humans can imagine and overthink many potentially fictitious outcomes if they don't chase the carrot. Not staying late to finish tasks or in general putting in more hours to continually meet deadlines; fear is what motivates the worker. The manager sees that they are motivated, and often puts more on their plate. However, at any given time, when the worker decides that they do not wish to chase the carrot, they know there could be consequences for that decision. And instead of going on a vacation with their family, they stay behind. (I must admit, that I have done that before, twice).
When I first started my career, I didn't mind putting in the extra hours to try to learn, get ahead, and get noticed. The carrot was always dangling there in front of me. But as I got older and started a family, I started to realize that there is a need for work / life balance.
Some people however are motivated through fear and put their career before their family. A good movie that tells the consequences of that mentality is "About Schmidt" starring Jack Nicolson. After he retires he realizes that the company is moving on just fine without him, he barely knows his wife, and never really had much of a relationship with his daughter. When he tries to give her marriage advice, she tells him he has no right to do that since he was not there when she was growing up.
There will always be that carrot, but you need to decide if you will let fear motivate you. Don't live your life where you are counting down the days to retirement and reacting to fear. Ultimately, you need to do what makes you happy. In a future blog, I will review a book on that very topic.
Sunday, July 10, 2016
I Think Guardian Angels Are Real
During my post secondary education, I decided that it would be better to ride my bike to school instead of driving my car and paying for parking. I never really rode a bike that much on the road growing up and therefore did not have as much experience that I should have had. Also, at the time, bike helmets were not very common so there was not much in place to protect me if I had an accident.
I can remember the day. I had a lot on my mind as I was leaving school to return to my apartment. I obviously was not thinking of what I was doing, instead I was worrying about my problems, future problems and how I was going to resolve them.
The campus has a ring road around it. I usually would cut across a street to get to the path that I used. Instead of going to the lights and crossing properly I choose to cut across the road. The road had two lanes going one way and two going the other. There were several cars stopped in the closest lane as they were waiting for the traffic lights to change. I guess I was thinking that all four lanes were stopped (even though I was not really thinking about what I was doing). I decided to cut between two stopped cars and started to cross. As I crossed, I looked to my left and saw a truck coming (faster than the spreed limit for sure). This second lane actually did not have all the traffic stopped waiting for the light to change.
This is the part of the story, when I tell it, that I start to get a chill all over my body and get goosebumps everywhere. I remember someone grabbing me by my hips and pulling me off the bike. As this happened I came off my bike and landed in a standing position. My bike however, went right under the front right wheel of the pickup truck and was crushed flat. It was a bike right-off.
Standing there shaking, I looked around but there was no one standing by me who grabbed me. I remember a driver who was stopped in a car nearby say that they saw everything and that the truck driver was going too fast and it was his fault. I knew that it was my fault, I should not of crossed the road where I did, and I did not have my mind on what I was doing.
I swear to this day that a guardian angel must of pulled me off my bike. Some could argue that it was my own reflexes that helped me, but I can still remember the feeling of someone grabbing me at the hips pulling me off.
The truck driver stopped, who happened to be a 4th year student in the same program that I was in. He gave me a ride home, most likely very happy that he didn't kill anyone that day.
In a future blog, I will talk more about daydreaming and not staying in the present.
Let me know if you have had any similar experiences with guardian angels.
I can remember the day. I had a lot on my mind as I was leaving school to return to my apartment. I obviously was not thinking of what I was doing, instead I was worrying about my problems, future problems and how I was going to resolve them.
The campus has a ring road around it. I usually would cut across a street to get to the path that I used. Instead of going to the lights and crossing properly I choose to cut across the road. The road had two lanes going one way and two going the other. There were several cars stopped in the closest lane as they were waiting for the traffic lights to change. I guess I was thinking that all four lanes were stopped (even though I was not really thinking about what I was doing). I decided to cut between two stopped cars and started to cross. As I crossed, I looked to my left and saw a truck coming (faster than the spreed limit for sure). This second lane actually did not have all the traffic stopped waiting for the light to change.
This is the part of the story, when I tell it, that I start to get a chill all over my body and get goosebumps everywhere. I remember someone grabbing me by my hips and pulling me off the bike. As this happened I came off my bike and landed in a standing position. My bike however, went right under the front right wheel of the pickup truck and was crushed flat. It was a bike right-off.
Standing there shaking, I looked around but there was no one standing by me who grabbed me. I remember a driver who was stopped in a car nearby say that they saw everything and that the truck driver was going too fast and it was his fault. I knew that it was my fault, I should not of crossed the road where I did, and I did not have my mind on what I was doing.
I swear to this day that a guardian angel must of pulled me off my bike. Some could argue that it was my own reflexes that helped me, but I can still remember the feeling of someone grabbing me at the hips pulling me off.
The truck driver stopped, who happened to be a 4th year student in the same program that I was in. He gave me a ride home, most likely very happy that he didn't kill anyone that day.
In a future blog, I will talk more about daydreaming and not staying in the present.
Let me know if you have had any similar experiences with guardian angels.
Saturday, July 9, 2016
I Choose None
When my son was much younger, around 3, we were in a store shopping. We came upon a display that had dvd's for sale (please tell me you know what a dvd is, if not, google it).
I told him that he could choose one. I took him out of the shopping cart and set him on the floor so that he could choose. He immediately picked up two dvd's and said that he wanted both of them.
I reminded him that he could only choose one. He said "No, I want both of them".
I said "You can only choose one".
He said "No, I want both of them".
I said, "You can choose one, or you can choose none".
He then surprised us and said "I choose none".
I picked him up and we left the store. Never as we left did he say, "Ok, I will just choose one"! or "Wait stop, what are you doing, of course I will just choose one"! He just sat there looking slightly upset and never mentioned the incident again that day.
What the hell was that? Why wouldn't he at the last minute realize that we were serious and decide that he better just choose one instead of getting nothing?
Perhaps the problem was that in the past we would give in to him. Did we do that because we wanted to be like a friend? Did we want to buy his happiness?
I think it was a combination of the above and perhaps some stubbornness or pride on his side. (And some stubbornness and pride on my side). Either way, I think that if you give a child everything they want, they will not appreciate things in the future and you are just setting them up for future depression issues.
Also, when they get older, they may not be in the same financial position as you the parent, and if they cannot get everything they want, this "get everything" attitude will bring them down.
It also teaches us as parents that you should not give in to them so that they get everything they want. A child needs to understand boundaries and know that you are serious about the consequences. If you tell them to stop a certain behaviour before you count to 3 with the consequences of not getting something, and you count to 3 (or dramatically stop just after 2), they will learn that you are a pushover.
We want to give them everything, but there is more to life than material objects. Most people who win the lottery big time, usually do not in the long run claim a higher level of happiness.
Someone once said "The person who dies with the most toys, is still dead".
I told him that he could choose one. I took him out of the shopping cart and set him on the floor so that he could choose. He immediately picked up two dvd's and said that he wanted both of them.
I reminded him that he could only choose one. He said "No, I want both of them".
I said "You can only choose one".
He said "No, I want both of them".
I said, "You can choose one, or you can choose none".
He then surprised us and said "I choose none".
I picked him up and we left the store. Never as we left did he say, "Ok, I will just choose one"! or "Wait stop, what are you doing, of course I will just choose one"! He just sat there looking slightly upset and never mentioned the incident again that day.
What the hell was that? Why wouldn't he at the last minute realize that we were serious and decide that he better just choose one instead of getting nothing?
Perhaps the problem was that in the past we would give in to him. Did we do that because we wanted to be like a friend? Did we want to buy his happiness?
I think it was a combination of the above and perhaps some stubbornness or pride on his side. (And some stubbornness and pride on my side). Either way, I think that if you give a child everything they want, they will not appreciate things in the future and you are just setting them up for future depression issues.
Also, when they get older, they may not be in the same financial position as you the parent, and if they cannot get everything they want, this "get everything" attitude will bring them down.
It also teaches us as parents that you should not give in to them so that they get everything they want. A child needs to understand boundaries and know that you are serious about the consequences. If you tell them to stop a certain behaviour before you count to 3 with the consequences of not getting something, and you count to 3 (or dramatically stop just after 2), they will learn that you are a pushover.
We want to give them everything, but there is more to life than material objects. Most people who win the lottery big time, usually do not in the long run claim a higher level of happiness.
Someone once said "The person who dies with the most toys, is still dead".
Friday, July 8, 2016
Calculate The Area Of A Circle Simple Explanation
Ever wonder where the formula for calculating the area of a circle came from? I learned this in public school and thought it was a great way to explain the formula in simple terms.
Lets take an example of a circle with a diameter d.
By definition, the radius is half the length of the diameter of a circle. The diameter is a straight line that goes through the centre of a circle and each end goes to the circumference of the circle. The radius is a straight line that goes from the centre of a circle to anywhere on the circumference of the circle. Written as an equation:
Diameter (d) = 2 x radius (r)
Some guy figured out that if you take the diameter of a circle and wrap it around the circumference, it will go around it 3.14159265359 times (the decimal numbers seem to go on forever, but using 3.14 usually is accurate enough, or you can use the pi button on your calculator). For example, take a string and cut it the length of the circle's diameter. Draw the circle to scale on a piece of paper and see how many times the string will wrap around the circumference. You should find that it goes just over 3.14 times. See crude sketch below.
Written as an equation:
Circumference (c) = pi (3.14) x diameter (d)
or
Circumference (c) = pi (3.14) x radius (r) x 2
Lets take an example of a circle with a diameter d.
By definition, the radius is half the length of the diameter of a circle. The diameter is a straight line that goes through the centre of a circle and each end goes to the circumference of the circle. The radius is a straight line that goes from the centre of a circle to anywhere on the circumference of the circle. Written as an equation:
Diameter (d) = 2 x radius (r)
Some guy figured out that if you take the diameter of a circle and wrap it around the circumference, it will go around it 3.14159265359 times (the decimal numbers seem to go on forever, but using 3.14 usually is accurate enough, or you can use the pi button on your calculator). For example, take a string and cut it the length of the circle's diameter. Draw the circle to scale on a piece of paper and see how many times the string will wrap around the circumference. You should find that it goes just over 3.14 times. See crude sketch below.
Written as an equation:
Circumference (c) = pi (3.14) x diameter (d)
or
Circumference (c) = pi (3.14) x radius (r) x 2
If you cut the circle up like a pie (no I don't think thats where pi comes from) into 16 pieces, it will look like the sketch below:
Now if you take those 16 slices and stack them up, it will look like the sketch below:
The length shown in the vertical is pi x r. This is because the length is half of the total circumference of a circle (half the circumference is on the left side and half is on the right side) which is 1/2 x pi x d which is the same as 1/2 x pi x 2r (which equals pi x r).
The length shown in the horizontal is simply the radius of the circle r.
Now that we have converted this circle into a crude rectangle, and imagine that as we make more slices out of the circle and continue until we have infinity (really big number) slices, the circular arcs will now become straight and we will really have a rectangle.
Therefore the formula of a circle is derived from the length x width formula of a rectangle, in this case it is:
Area = length (pi x r) x width (r) = pi x r x r =
A
=
π
r
2
Note the symbol π stands for pi.
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